Saturday, August 11, 2007

Kodaikannal Trip -1st day

I have always wanted to visit few places in South , which even though did not had a chance to go for past 2 years in South. and as i play my final innings in South India , there is one thing , i am pretty sure about . I love the climate here , and come downtown anytime , but definitely not on long term basis, never again. This time i had a trip planned to kodaikanal , and with my mamaji ,mamiji and Srikant coming to visit bangalore , and spend sometime with me. It was the stay with them one of the most beautiful times i had spend in bangalore. As per the plan , i had booked a cab from Amrit Travels, Bangalore. But the driver did not showed up at expected time of 7AM, and it was indeed most embarrasing for me. To be in this situation , then me and mamaji went on bike to book a fresh cab. And that with immediate requirement, it was not easy. The trip was delayed by over 4 hours , and this is what defined the remaining journey as in hurry and fast paced , stopping at places enough to soak the natural beauty in minds, soul and freshen ourselves from those boring java files .

The picture above is just the starting of the journey which was more than 1200Kms in 5 days across South India. The climate was just fine , and the ambience in car was great. The journey was long ,longer , longer .. kodaikannal was more than 500Kms , and that too cover the same in daylight was a big mistake. The only thing we did in first day was sleep , waiting to get close. each milestone seems to read the same distance. I always considered south will show up many good surroundings, but from bangalore to kodaikannal was nothing but a barren land sort, and it got more and more boring over the day. at dusk , we reached a view point.

By the time the driver annouced there is something is there to visit , we sprang in happiness, and without any care for the shabby hairstyle or sleepy looks , jumped out of the doors in the mid way to kodai , the place that will shelter us for 2 more nights to come. Below is the pic , and u can see me with Srikant ( believe me , over this period i will tell something about this nice chap and nice chapter he had it with me). else his hair are always fine , and this pic should be considered a rare when u can see sri's hair dishevelled , and this is not because he did not comb it , but because the air currents were too strong. There is also an associated video at this place which will be uploaded shortly but available only for personal friends.

And then we proceeded to Kodaikannal , there was a proposal to stop and stay in between and cover the remaining distance of 30 Kms uphill next morning , but this was rejected by all , as this will mean wasting an entire day, and this proved to be correct decision , and then we got a cottage with ease and bargained to get it at nominal rate , the rooms big , large , economical and had a TV set with cable facility, and i will not at all in first post tell why this was necessary. Then we had a dinner nearby , and watched TV and slept silently in cosy rooms ....Second day blog will be lot better , lots of more expeiences and more pics to share .

One More Friend Lost ..

Last few weeks have been most entralling in my life , when i am getting new friends and losing old ones, for like a snake i am , seems like loosing the old skin, but believe me its very very painful. A tear trickles down the eye, with each falling wicket. with each wound that has over the times dug deep in the flesh, that the marks will stay till the end. How easy it is to end something you wanted for so long. For losing love i have never loved , but losing good friends is what has started pinching me. For so long have i been tired to smile now, for someone who might not even consider me a friend. for all those who still talk to me cauz i call them sometimes or we chat regularly .. PLEASE STOP ... Some friends are made life long , and as such one expect them to be there.
There can be sometimes when the mood is not right , but you dont tell a friend , i am watching TV. seems somethings more important than me. I believe one odd day humans might be able to survive without food , water or oxygen , but without friends .. impossible, for that will be existing and not living...
Some people grow so fast in the career , and at such a pace , that they start ignoring turtle paced people like me. for them who dont care about bad luck , and still for those friend whose major concern seems to be more than other people watching scraps by them in my srapbook as potentional danger as to what others will say, there is just one thing i wanna say. believe me , i dont want to , but here it goes .. "always be nice to people on your way up , you generally meet them on your way down".
I know i have been too slow in this fast paced world, and friends are tired of moving so slow. and here i stand in this world , making new friends who will also one day lose my hand in this fast paced world. And this is what i have stopped from making new friends, want to hold a few left. some of my best pals , my best stress relievers have now become so big , that they dont have time or advise. only one thing u can expect from them , ask yourself. I have been left in this jungle world as a foe among friends. thank you miss , it has been nice knowing you for so long ...
one thing i realised evening of aug 10, friday that it is so easy to be shut, to feel so little, to be eradicate. time when i realised people dont take me serious any more. for should i stop fooling around. for i will try to seal my lips.
For this friend of mine ,anyone can take a guess.
I know i dont have any manners to talk to anyone, but to be neglected as today , to make me realise what I am ... to tell not the world , who cares about it after all (other than her) ... feels real good. good bye friend , you will go to greater heights , to places never touched by anyone. Ask me it will be very very very hard for me to live without taking her advise, but i promise i will never ever again disturb you while you are watching TV or not ...

Friday, August 10, 2007

The Times Have Changed And So Must you

It has been a real long journey through life, and living in most optimistic terms, i stand close to complete a quater of my life next year. And believe me , it was till 12th i was in shell , which broke loose with time. I wanted to tell something about my darjeeling trip, but jsut changed my mind. Lets start with me, most of my friends know i am jolly , freak and most weird person on earth. may b good at heart, may b good friend, a true one ... but just a friend . and i am in bad habit of making best friends. i still strongly believe you can know a thousand faces , a million names , but those who are friends are rare. talking someone , helping someone is not friendship. Friendship is when scolding for wrong things, when praising for right things and sometimes scolding for right things. To know who yr heart says iz yr friend is really not that difficult. a friend says something which if any other person would have said , you will not feel good , but with friends it becomes light mood. Friends are nothing more than a bunch of spoiled pack of wolves who keep on attacking each other .. one who on face says .. "u again , how the hell u escaped that erratic bus" , and still having a finger crossed and thanking God for safety of the friend .
Friend dont leave u in distress , so shud also not be left in hapiness .. Friends multiply the smiles and Square the cries.
One such incident happened in my life when i was giving my semester exams. I as usual relied highly on kanika to answer the questions,but she was seating atleast 2 rows from where i sat. And the combination of seating arrangement was so pathetic (best ) that there no college person from my college in my immediate surrounding. the First day i realised it will be going to be tough time passing these exams and i will really have to fool the examiner in first exam , and study really well in remaining. my idea of perfect 80% was lost , and what remained was a slight hope of passing. And there she sat behind me , an unknown girl from an unknown college, but the looks told she was definitely a topper. I tried asking her once or twice about some answer , but each time i looked back, the big specs , and the way she looked , i was damn sure she will tell the examiner, so never asked. Then in fluid mechanics , i dont know where i got the power and just asked her .. if u wanna tell tje examiner tell , but tell me the answer to a particular question, and the way she helped me was she allowed me to peep in her answer book , and i thankfully passed. One more thing , i never asked that girl anything in remaining exams. For a few close friends know her , and I still cherish those times ... This was not end of our meeting , and we met again , and that will come sometime later. But for Anand , Rhythm please dont guess the names ,u are a few ppl other than the girl who know whom i am talking now ..

For Have I Changed

there are times in life when you are bound to ask yourself. Are the things going right , correct and in a pre defined manner. the way you would expect it to be. But life is really not like water , which takes shape of the vessel it is poured in, instead life shows resistence. the emotions squeeze out like water from the sponge , and one has to control these , failing to do so will show , not to the world but to the few , that there is a deep problem.
Its the Friends , who eventually help each other lubricate in friction situations, one friend after the other , all uniting as the spokes of wheel to make it circular , and the faith , trust and understanding help them move through this journey of life. The better the friends , the faster the speed, but in speed one must not forget that we still are same friends. Sometimes , few friends might consider themselves as superior, or mayb inferior to the other person. then in both the cases , it is a duty of true friends to go up , and tell the other friend .
It has been long 24 years in life , and i have had friends from each section, that may be peers , seniors and juniors , and it all boils down to one aspect, a single question which if answered correctly and honestly to oneself will help to get the thing one aspired for ...Ask yourself , am i true friend ...
i dont say the above answer in denial ,but there have been times when i have cried with friends when unable to wipe the tears off , smiled and laughed in situations when each single nerve in me wanted to cry. I dont say i can be best friend to someone , because that is a comittement too big , i dont say i have been friends to anyone till date. Its more like give and take relationships , when u give happiness and recieve your share .
It has been a real pain for me to understand , i still dont understand what is friendship. I never understood the statement "No thanks , no sorry in friendship" , rather i wud ask my friends ' dont say thank u , cauz if sum of the other friend forget to say thanks, i must not feel bad'.

The attitude towards life changes due to certain factors. Sometimes u are vry happy , and find something that gives a complete 180 degrees to your emotions.
i know i have failed in many of my recent friendships , expecting much more than i should. I have certainly gone greedy , trying to give 200% of me , and expecting the same in return. Few people in my life , and all know everything about me.
On last count , 14 people know what is going in my life , and only 2 of them can really tell , something is wrong. And of these , there is still one , who came upto me to tell me ...
Friend Wait ... You are going in wrong direction , and i dont give a damn about it , and i want all the crap scrapped right away .
Somethings in life deserved a royal paint , and you are one of those ..

this post is dedicated to all the ppl who read the scrap before it was deleted due to obvious reasons

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

Do You Really Believe In God (only if u r free)

Do i really dont believe in god, or that he cease to exist for a non-existent being. for the success of those we describe as luck, can be a metaphor of God coming and helping. have i not ,on regular basis seeked his help for all that i think is not only improbable,but mayb impossible. do i not remember him daily before i start my work. even if he does not exist, why do i join my hands and put my head down to sky when there is a result expected of near and dear ones. He comes to you when you need him , or u realise it only in time of need. he is one of those , who lives as a King above us .. he is one of those who will answer the prayers even if u dont fold your hands. he can change your mood , your perception of life , just like that. He is like time, or time is him. What is considered most powerful healer, the time... the God ... for all those 14 years in school when we used to stand in burning sun, praying for God , i never felt a need. Just a waste of time, still i consider it so, but there needs to be someone that has to imbibe in us, the fear of unknown. The fear of most powerful , the fear of time , fear of God .. but wasting time should not be considered weakening the God ... because we all join to become the almighty... and it is the weakest link that breaks .. and for that is GOD. to come to heal you at the time when we all think its over.

Some say GOD is power, sheer agression , an emotion , a feeling , something that can never be wrong. why is it that god be always combined with divine powers. His combination with ability to do something perfect. There is a friend of mine who thinks God is perfection. Something you want to look upto when in crisis. Some say God is in you ,but that is what all says .. god is everywhere.God is perception that he is perfect, something in there that is perfect.

Then there was a very nice reply from one of my friends , God is dependable. but is god really dependable, he can also fail,or can he not. for if the existence of God is a reality so must be existence of devil. so can he fail in situations most unexpected .

I dont know whether he exists or not , whether making humans was his greatest mistakes , or humans making God .. but there is something , some supernatural power , that when preached upon give one confidence , the power , the consolance.

If you ask me , God is Faith .. faith which has to stand tall amist all the blunders , amist all the dreadful sins, amist all that one dare not.. believe me ... There is GOD .. and you gonna believe me .. even though i dont believe in God as of now , But very soon , this gotta change ..

Tuesday, August 7, 2007

For So Long Avoided The Words ....

It has been a real long journey in the world , with 24 years to my backing . with so many different things that happened .. with so many feeling , with so many occassions .. .and here i am sitting to pen down each memory that ever was .. for i wish to live ... long time , big time ... to be there once i am no more .. i still want a lone wanderer to know , to share to feel the excitement , the differnce in similarities .. the miraculaous escapes .. the things kept to my heart .. am going to pen down each and every thing , from losing a rat race in KG to winning a battle of pro's . to study in a closed room to have masti big time with my friends ..
from seeing my siblings grow bigger, bolder and me on the other side of rich getting richer ...
with my luck so used by others , and how it eluded me .. for all i have to all i dont have... its all coming down soon .. and its only words , i will be playing with