Sunday, April 27, 2008

The Ghost

It was 31 August 2007. I was driving through the busy lanes of Bangalore on Hosur Road. It had rained heavily today and streets are clogged with water. I was returning from office after not so beautiful day. There was possibly an open drain and the bus ahead of me veered to the right without signal. It hit me right there and for first time i was flying in air. I was in air for so long that i was able to see all the busy roads and traffic jam for 2 more kms and "Thud". all went blank , and i dont exactly remember where I was. I opened by eyes in a home in Bangalore. A very well maintained house.
"wow , this is awsome". Nice marble floor , a very religious fragnance and whew ... a fully setup house. But it was strange , i did not have a single injury on me. I was like 100% fit. I checked everywhere but i could not find a mobile. no wallet , nothing. just a very flexible boneless body. What has i changed into and where was I. I still could not make it out. I went to window and wanted to go out. But to move out, I should have gone to door but i glided to window. What was happening to me . As i crossed the window in the garden , i can glide through the air as if walking. Let me go a bit more out , but as soon as i reached the wall of the park i could move no longer. I met with an invisible wall, i cant break or glide. I spent an hour , or may be two parsing the entire area but still could not find the way out. I banged my head, only first time i seemed to have incurred a physical pain. it hurts. I tried once more , and a stream of blood came oozing out.
I wanted to move out. i wanted to meet my friends , call them. And above all , i wanted to know whats happening to me. I think i saw a landline, yes it was there in the big drawing room. i glided to the room and picked the phone. i didnt need to pick up the phone but it came and stuck on to my ears. the number i remember 97D$FFFBB$ , and dialled it.
The voice that i supported for so many years , i loved talking to , and the one we just had a fight the last night. The phone rang , and she picked it up. I tried to speak , to yell , to make her hear , even shouted but the line went dead. i tried over and again , not understanding anything. Probably she got frustrated , and then gave a miss call. i had now known its no use picking, and its a landline and i dont know how to ignore that. Eventually with all strength in eternity i picked up the phone , and she just said , " Deepak , is it you . See please i am sorry for what i said yesterday. i know you have been nice to me , but why dont you understand , you make me cry. Now would you utter a word , i know its you yaar. "
First time in life , i wanted words to come out of my mouth and it did not. She hung the phone angrily . A tear trickled down my eyes and i dropped in there. weeping like a small kid , not knowing what to do and how to , till i was waken up by a dusky beauty who opened the door and went past me . I stood up and said," Hello miss, i dont know how i am here. I really dont know how i got in here. do you know . have you got me out from that accident. " But the beautiful girl just passed through without looking at me even once. i stood up and touched her. she looked back. She felt someone just touched her , but she could not see me . i put a palm on her shoulder but she still could not see. Her expressions changed from normal ones to frightened one.
" whos there. " she shouted . She was scared to hell and i decided to keep mum. I did not touch her even once. instead i glided out of the window trying to find a way out , but could not. There was this thing getting heavier on me. I need to move out , i have no clue of what was going on. whats the time , where is the world , who is inside. her face looked so familiar and i am still thinking , how is it possible. I decided to go to her once more and try to recognise who she was. She was standing , just out of the shower. a water droplet just trickled down the hair , and the neon bulb in the back , it looked as morning dew meeting the first light in the morning. She was just angelic , just so beautiful. she was definitley not fair as milk , but she is the best beauty i have ever seen. and there she logs in her lappy , and in her orkut . and i see my scrap there( forget it if u dont know what that is , that is actually for mortals, and if u have left the world before 2005 , you will probably not know of terms like orkut , scrapbook , facebook and picassa) ... Shaaammmuuuuuuuuu ...... oh my God , i am in her place , and i can see her. But why is she not replying to anything i try to do. why is it i can do so many things still so many i just imagine. I just went to her lappy , i cud read something. i wanted to ask her to move to my page , but she was reading my messages and crying. i tried to type to tell her look , i am here. the keys were pressed but nothing appeared on screen. A few keys pressing for themselves , and she was the frightened one. She went to sleep , and i cherished her like a small kid. Somethings i always wanted to do always. This is a motherly love, she knew something is around her. She was sure someone is playing with her silky hair , and there is invisible love besides that invisible cloak that invisible man wears.
to all my ghost friends still reading what happens nexxt is more pain and cries and blood... please tell the ones you love that you do , and for God's sake , drive that bike a bit slowly. There is no blog in Shammu 's house , u can hear the voices but not interact.

It has not been easy being a ghost. Things change drastically. So many inaccessible things have become easily accessible. Life after death is full of life. I enjoy flying high in sky, dive in deep deeper deepest of the roads, get out from other side of the city, maybe from some other city and enjoy. But just like it gives me so much power, it devoids me of the most powerful emotions. I carry the feelings still but I don’t carry the heart. I don’t have brain but I have power to make decisions, and most of the times I get crushed under car or truck because I am not sure whether I should move right or left. The injuries no longer bleed me , but the heart .. oops … something in me still pains. I still want to go to that Scientific Research of Ghosts , but its sad the inventor of services like GOOGLE are still not ghosts. We have Fortran here , and abacus , even ghost telephone directory, but quick service is not there. I would like to trade a few things with humans here. I tried talking to God to negotiate but he wont give an ear. He says if Humans get to be a little powers of ghosts they will throw God out of his position , and probably he is right. I asked him if he really paid heeds to people who pray in the morning daily. He went mum, slapped me and quietly went off. I don’t have a face now but his slap left 5 fingerprints and a bloody face. Then as I was back in Shammu’s home and relaxing on that big luxurious double bed … aaah it feels so world best to jump up and down , there were a few creases made due to my rolling. And for someone watching me was like watching creases made itself. And there was Shammu who saw me in there. She was hysterical , in tears only. I went to her , took her in my embrace and caressed her like a small kid. She looked around but there was no one. She was terrified but think she felt the love. She let herself in me. Her entire weight against the fangless ghost. I know I could not support her , I don’t have a solid body for doing so ,but somehow she was all engulfed in me , like cushioned. Her crying was stopped and it took a moment for her to realize she is in arms of someone not known to her. Some heavenly force , some magnetic field , something she didn’t have explaination, and even though her mind told her to get away, it was easily defeated by verdict of the heart which let her there for a while, disturbed by a sound calling from back , “Sharmila… what happened “ . I suddenly lost control and she just balanced herself before she could hit the floor.

She continued ,”What happened friend , why you upset”.

Another tear trickled down her face, and she looked around , expecting my hand to come and wipe it off , but it fell. And I caught it in mid air , and she had known I was still there. For sure, a tear was followed by second and then third. This time it seemed to be mixed emotions.

“Would you tell me whats the matter Sharmila. I know you have been bad times recently. Now don’t tell me its that friend of yours , some Bingo Dingo you are still shedding tears for. Anyhow you guys never met , and he left you in middle of nowhere , he was the one who used to sms you , chat whole day long and those big big scraps. And what happened one fine day , he flies to US of A , and does not even care to inform you. I mean , grow up baby , you just cant waste your life like that. Move on with life. He was just an illusion , a milestone you should have not set the legs on. A mistake you did in making friends. Ok , we will move and get best of food today. Cheer up , we are going in for movie”.

Shamu sitting on the bed , crying like a small baby , handed over a chit to her friend. Her friend was still wondering and asked her, ”what is this. Seems like some username. So what are you upto. What is this, and is this Dingo’s id. So you found a way to break it. See, Shammu if he doesn’t love you , no matter how hard you try, he wont come back. Did he called you even once, any sms , any contacts he tried to do.”

Shamu got all her strength together and in a barely audible voice said,” Dingo left me this in his will”.

There was a silence of the death, as her friend was left with no words, horror struck her like anything.

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